Two and a half weeks ago you turned 1 and we celebrated the gift that you are to this family/ to this world. It is always bittersweet to close one chapter and open another. As your mom, I feel like the first year is always the hardest. With both you and your sister I experienced the joy of welcoming this new phase of mobility and dawning comprehension, mingled with sadness to say goodbye to the months of you needing me for everything. I am so proud of the little man that you are and excited for the memories we will make together as you learn to walk and talk.
In many ways you have been my level ground this year in navigating life with two babies. When I was worried that I would lose my mind from exhaustion and feeling inadequate, you would smile at me and snuggle close. When Aria was struggling with her new reality of divided attention, you showed her that she could make you laugh, and in doing so made her fall in love with you too. In so many moments full of tension you did not understand, you were peaceful and calm, and your chill caused us all to slow down and enjoy you. It is not easy entering life on this side of Mommy and learning how to exist, but you filled our home to the brim with joy as soon as you arrived, and now we cannot imagine life without you.
I want so much for you in this life, and I hope that your Daddy and I can guide you humbly as you take in the world with all of your senses, and make heads or tails of what it is to be created in God's image. My prayer for you is that you walk with the Lord all your life and serve him as if this world depended on it, because it does. We can fall into despair when we realize how tiny we are in the grand enormity of the universe. But, in the midst of it all, God decided to put you here for a reason. He gave you to us, and he gave us to you. And that means that we all have something to learn from each other. I am so honored to be the woman who shepherded you into this life and I will hold your and your sister's hands until you let go, to pave your own way. May you ask all the big questions and grow in wisdom, as well as stature.
We laugh all the time at how tame and agreeable our little lion cub turned out to be. When you read this one day, I wonder what kind of ways you will have surprised us by your inner ferocity for life and zeal for love. For now, you are the calm goofy bubba boy who loves to eat. I am good with this because my favorite lion of all time is Aslan, the gentle and terrible King of Kings, the Christ-figure of Narnia. May you reflect your creator in the strength of your convictions. May you "walk with stately stride," and "retreat before nothing."(Proverbs 30)
I cannot wait to see the man that you become, but for now I will enjoy being the only woman in the world in your eyes. I will relish these moments together as I teach you how to love the one you will marry one day, as Daddy's mommy taught him to love me. I consider it one of the greatest privileges a woman can ever receive in this life, to love and be loved by a little boy. You and your sister are my world, and Daddy and I love you so very much. Happy birthday little son, brave lion of the earth. It has been the most wonderful first year with you.
Love always,
Mommy.
